Focus Forward

I have been wearing a necklace for a couple of years, one of those trendy ones with a locket you can personalize with various tiny charms. Mine has a background plate with the word ‘Passion’, a running shoe, and a dumbbell. Well, that’s what was in my locket up until yesterday when I removed the running shoe. It has been 15 months since I last went for a run, and I had been considering the removal of the shoe charm for the past several months. Despite my chiropractor’s statements that, for me, running again is a not now thing rather than a never thing, he subtly ignores any reference that I might make about running, which leads me to believe that he isn’t so inclined to ever give me the green light. Others tell me that I can do what I want to, including running, and I suppose there is truth to that. I am certainly no stranger to being stubborn in doing what I want rather than what is best for me at times, yet I am oddly reluctant to be rebellious in this area. Heck, I feel like a rebel just breaking into a bit of a jog to cross the street!

I have been a good girl in following the advice of my chiropractor, but it hasn’t been easy to let go of the desire to get out there and run. My goals have changed to powerlifting, so I have no desire to run long distances. It would just be nice to be able to go for a short run from time to time…because I could. I probably could, but I don’t want to risk aggravating the areas which were the cause of the “no running” ban in the first place. Still, I’ve been taking incredibly small baby steps towards letting go of running. Last July, I finally unsubscribed to The Running Room emails and stopped following their Facebook page. Yesterday I removed the running shoe charm from my necklace, and I didn’t know how to feel. It felt like I was giving up on the prospect of running again. My chiropractor said that I am focusing my intentions.

I’ve been thinking about his response, and this morning I realized that he was correct. My goals are big enough to crush most people, and pounding pavement for 20-30 minutes really isn’t going to help me much in achieving those goals. Even though running hasn’t even been on the back burner for a long time, I’ve been clinging to it, afraid to let go because it felt like giving up, like failure, and I hate to fail. My chiropractor’s comment chafed a bit, because I think I’ve been fairly good at staying focused over the past few years. It felt like a sassy response at a time when I was feeling emotional and low. But I appreciate it now. I am thankful for his response. He’s right. I am focusing my intentions. Is it the end of the world if I never run again? No. I’d much rather stay healthy and keep lifting weights. I do have big powerlifting goals, and I will need to stay focused in order to make them happen.

1a. squats-low bar, with sleeves

45 lbs x 10, 95 x 8, 125 x 6, 155 x 6, 185 x 6, 195 x 6, 195 x 5, 185 x 6

These weren’t quite as fast or as easy as last week, but that’s okay. 195 pounds felt slightly heavy on my back today, and the second set was a bit challenging. The backdown set was much better, and I was able to find my groove again. I did have some wrist discomfort on the heavier sets which was likely part of why everything felt heavier. A couple of days ago I rolled my right wrist awkwardly at home, and it’s felt slightly uncomfortable off and on ever since.

1b. bench press-competition grip

43 lbs x 10, 63 x 8, 85 x 8, 105 x 6, 110 x 6, 110 x 6 pause the last rep, 105 x 6

These were solid, smooth, and moving well.

2a. pause squats-low bar, with sleeves

135 lbs x 5, 155 x 6

2b. Spoto presses-competition grip, 2 second pause

85 lbs x 5, 85 x 6

 

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