I had a decent sleep. I ate fairly well. I had a good work day. So why am I on the verge of tears, moody and grumpy? Why do I still feel that way after training at my happy place? Well, I’ve got a few theories, excuses, reasons, but I’m going to leave them locked up tight inside my head. I recognize the demons inside my head, and I know well the damage they can leave in their path.
And so today’s training session wasn’t really the greatest. It’s exceedingly rare for a training session to fail to wipe out a bad mood, but that’s exactly what happened today. The training wasn’t horrible, and there were a few smiles to be seen, but I was ever so glad to walk out the door into the pouring rain. It didn’t matter that I was wearing a sweaty t-shirt, a skort and sandals. I would have loved to tarry in the rain longer, but I had left the windows of my car open just enough that the rain was getting in. And I still have to try and keep my tattoo relatively dry. Sadly, I drove out of the rain and the storm as I got closer to home, but the storm still rages inside.
1a. squats, high bar, closer hand position, knee sleeves
45 x 8, 95 x 8, 125 x 8, 155 x 5
with belt: 185 x 5, 205 x 5, 205 x 5, 225 x 1, 185 x 4
The squats actually started out feeling rather good. Even the sets at 205 didn’t feel very heavy, but I did struggle with being pushed forward. So we lowered the bar just slightly for the second set at 205. I think that set was a bit better, but I honestly don’t remember. The single felt okay. The back-down set at 185 was so much tougher than it should have been. I completely lost my balance coming up from the first rep and had to take a step forward to recover it. The remaining reps were tough. It felt like each rep was a competition between my legs as to which one was going to feel like it was lagging behind. If Michael hadn’t called it after the fourth rep, I would have and I am not happy about feeling that desire to quit.
1b. bench press, competition grip and <sigh> touch and go
43 x 10, 65 x 8, 85 x 8, 100 x 6, 110 x 4 + 1, 110 x 4 + 1, 105 x 4 + 1
As much as I don’t like the ‘touch and go’, these were not too bad, perhaps because Michael gave me permission to slow the eccentric just enough so I could keep control. The sets of 4 + 1 were four reps touch and go and then one rep paused. The first set at 11o was tough and likely ugly. The second was slightly better.
90 x 11 AMRAP
This was an improvement over last week, so I’m happy about that.
2a. chest-supported rows
90 x 8, 90 x 6 + 45 x 8
These just sucked. I know I can do better than how these felt.
2b. dips, with blue band
Michael asked which band to which I replied the biggest one and to which he gave me a look. It’s been a while since I’ve done dips, and I was already feeling defeated.
x 6, x 7
Then I enjoyed my brief foray into the rain and fought back tears all the way home.